1100 Square foot Palace

Our house is looking gorgeous. It is such a departure from the stinky, blue-carpeted mess that I saw when I first met Ryan. All the floors are finished. Even in the bathroom. The furniture is beautiful. The trim is..well, almost all painted. I am so lucky that Ryan has dedicated himself to these projects as I have. He's actually done a hell of a lot more work on them.

Some of you living in cramped quarters in a big city like New York might say, 1100 square feet! That is the Taj Mahal compared to my 500 sqft one room hovel! Yeah yeah, I don't live in NYC. I live in a small country town, and squeezing us four people into this space is a challenge. Now that we have our w/d connection in the kitchen, we finally have a third bedroom. And once Ryan removes the old washer/dryer, we'll have a storage closet. Yes, we've lived with only two closets in this house.

All that said, I'm tired of living in a work-in-progress. I'm ready to live in a place that makes me happy. Where I can spend a day in the yard making it beautiful only because I want to. Not because I want the house to look sellable.

Anyway, the mac'n'cheese is almost ready, so I'd better get lunch ready for Katie Bel. She's gonna love it. Like usual.

One Social Q at a Time

Every Friday, I look forward to reading the Social Q's column in the New York Times. It's found in the Style section, and the columnist answers readers' questions about etiquette. It's hilarious. But it's also scary how often it is published.

You'd think it's a whole week. Seven complete days and nights. All those hours and minutes, and yet, I feel like I blink my eyes, and it's Friday again. I spend my work days wishing away the time, praying for Friday to come. Monday morning is a chore for me, and I resent having to get up and go to work. Sure, I like work because it gives me some purpose other than being a wife and mother. Am I doing what I really should be doing, though, if I dread going to sleep on Sunday night? Winslow is going to be six months old very soon, and it feels more like six minutes. Time is passing me by while I have little to show for it. Much of that time I've spent away from my children, allowing them to spend too much time at daycare (which we call "school" to help assuage guilt). These days, it's a common reality for many of us. With depressed and stagnant wages, it is very difficult for a parent to stay home with the kids without making outrageous sacrifices. I don't mean cutting the restaurant budget from $400 to $200 a month. I mean cutting out all retirement savings. Forgoing all social activities. Sacrificing nutrition for the sake of saving a few bucks. I can't do that. It's tight enough with both of us working. For now, it'll have to stay the way it is.

As for figuring out what to do that is meaningful, i'm not there yet. I am praying to have no regrets when I look back on this time of my life.

Calgary Challenge

This past trip was a tough one. On our return home, our flight got canceled out of Minneapolis. We spend hours and hours at the airport trying to get to Atlanta, and our total travel time was about 32 hours. Exhausting. My travel companion was delightful, but I hope to never go through that again. Calgary was gorgeous, however. We'll see if I return any time soon.

The trip was tough in other ways, too. Coming home to my dear Katie Bel broke my heart. She has been so clingy. I am praying that my next trip is not soon. I'm not sure I can keep this up, especially since I don't have any hopes for more financial incentive anytime soon. Is this worth it?

On another note, Ryan is at the house right now finishing the floor work with his dad. The family is staying with his parents, and they are saints. Literally. We won't be back home for at least a few days while the wood cures and the fumes dissipate. I'm ready for the house to be finished. On Monday, I'm probably taking a day to paint the girls' room.

Housework Blitz

The house is a complete wreck! We are in the middle of some major projects...having the washer/dryer connections installed in the kitchen, refinishing the floors in the bedrooms, finishing the front porch work. The house is finally going to be the most livable it can be once the work is complete. The only problem? We have a storage unit now. I hate that.

HATE IT!

I think storage units are for people with hoarding issues. Of course, there are exceptions. Needing to keep work files for a few years before destroying them...requiring space because of a temporary living situation...staging your home for sale. But right now, we are doing none of the above. Yes, we'd love to sell our house. Is it the right time yet? Doesn't seem so. Where would we go? Our mortgage payment is only about 15% of our takehome pay, and honestly, we can't afford to make it any higher.

So my plan for the storage unit is to see if I miss anything I've stored there. If we live without it for a couple of months, it's going to be sold or sent to charity. I will not allow my possessions to own me.

At the same time, we are in the market for some new furniture. Katie Bel is growing out of her crib, and she needs a big girl bed. Sure, I could buy something from Pottery Barn or The Company Store--there are some cute pieces there--but they're not made to last and tend to be made of pressed wood. I want something that my Katie Bel can have when she's grown. I found a matching pair of 3/4 sized beds built from solid Mahogany. Stunning. They are gorgeous and would cost about the same as a new pair, except that we'd have to get custom mattresses. Plus, where would we put the other bed? We haven't decided yet. The furniture is at the consignment shop and will be discounted 20% after March 16. Every penny counts. I'm headed out antiquing this morning to see if I find anything else.

I can't wait for the floors and the porch to be finished. Just in time for spring.